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本帖最后由 三思 于 2011-4-16 09:04 编辑 , c V# v9 s' P
幼儿园还要再给他像你说的这样办一遍的,和家长弄是不矛盾的,美好记忆完全可以更多一点,没有必要限制,只要精力和财力允许,完全可以办生日会,生日会怎么算也算不着不好的风气9 O7 ?, P4 B* q; L) J
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娃是很知道party的special的, ...
* T% m- t7 u. S+ A0 q* j% osweetlele 发表于 2011-4-15 22:43 / y5 l% p. s8 A3 |2 Y% Z, E
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我认为大型生日会是不良风气,因为一部分有精力财力的家庭给没有精力财力的家庭造成了压力,父母因为担心孩子因此受到压力,而不得不举办同样形式的生日会。而这种形式并没有赋予生日会特别的意义。比如乐乐你设定的20元礼物符合标准,一个月9个生日,180元礼品预算,承受不起的家庭,是不是就没有能力让自己孩子参加朋友的生日会这样的社交活动?# b) O5 m7 f1 d/ L9 c
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我家的财力精力大概不能和乐乐家比,但是我觉得给小孩子的生日大肆刷卡不是一件值得提倡的事情,有悖我的教育观念。- |% U7 F8 E6 ~& ~
* }+ e+ \+ n5 j# ]" m1 j另外,我搜了一下,中外对小孩子生日会都有反对声音。这个网站特别好,http://birthdayswithoutpressure.org/专门讲生日会的,为什么当前的生日会是不良风气,有比我更多更好的解释和说明。其中也提到了乐乐你说的学校办一遍家长办一遍的问题,提到了孩子要赶很多生日会的问题。" Z' I0 ~( e8 ~2 n" }1 |
( F& m6 w' v% e) @# F- |4 P对孩子的不良影响也有非常详细的列举, N; M) E& @3 l$ q% q1 a$ k6 J* a$ I
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For Kids:
7 ]4 g$ e9 L/ r( d5 ]0 D% P& bNot all children face each of these consequences, but enough children experience them to give us worry. 3 K5 T# s& }+ |$ O
They get stressed out from parties that are too large and too orchestrated.' A9 L; n7 f# F! [% Q& p
They are overindulged by too many presents. ! W+ P( f; Y/ v& C1 s& \- X
They feel entitled to what they want, not just what they need.
" [" v f; F! \. \They feel envious of friends who get more—and someone will always get more.
. W1 z; n' U% i: k2 q/ N. ~ They feel disappointed, because enough is never enough.
9 r) C5 m7 j* W/ W0 ~! n Long term, they develop materialistic values that equate personal celebrations with accumulating things.% E' B, _2 } {( Q8 e. b
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For Parents:
0 p, i. v5 n1 q! ySome parents say they are happy with birthday parties that drive other parents up the wall. But we have talked to many parents who report these consequences.2 U+ g3 @ j3 I& P! ]
They feel pressured to “make” their child “happy” by meeting escalating community standards for parties. 6 ~# D9 j) {' d3 ]
They feel guilty if the party was below community standards that they don’t really agree with.
' k8 F7 Z3 a" eThey feel overloaded with TOO MUCH STUFF, which they have to manage, organize, and clean up.
: Q: S) I3 ?/ ^% I. WThey feel an energy drain from planning, shopping, preparing, and hosting the party.& }! Z5 b7 Q5 j
They feel regret or resentment afterwards when their child, or others, is not appreciative enough—“Why did I extend myself so much?”" i! z* K$ x) t+ |
They run up debt from their own parties and from buying gifts for other parties./ I- \; m8 B, {, t& ]5 Z! b
They experience couple strife when parents do not agree on how big to make the party and how to carry it off.- E# s m# A$ d+ Y, g
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* X$ O# E9 k2 {# }For the Community and Culture:
& B* c# W: Z9 G( Q, @This issue is bigger than individual families. Personal decisions affect the wider world. Out of control birthday parties contribute to:* }, V# T" M& u% P8 K! m/ A/ n
A too much stuff culture 7 C5 F3 S0 ]: q3 c, ]
A me first culture7 u- P/ a$ H+ O- F' g% q6 u
A trash and waste culture, U Z' g& I, I. P* b
An entitlement culture
! E( Z, {. h; N8 k9 B/ v8 gA envy culture$ _6 {; [1 U5 e* }, q
A more of everything culture |
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