鲜花( 1394) 鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
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6 y$ z0 | n2 }6 C7 B4 HTake off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. / x" B. k; g9 e! F
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas., ]' v0 y: L% Q6 @
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Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -- $ c# t7 C# ^: F
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.4 M+ y, \0 e, ^
- S8 F. I0 b8 w0 \) {/ EGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
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. n/ t: [" @+ F* {Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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0 z& H! m$ a! ^" ~! H: KCondition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
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5 }! u" x6 M, E! t5 {Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. % |% |0 |: V. T& A7 `
: p4 ^: K0 |1 _( e4 t* y; pRinse conditioner off hair./ c9 v/ d( Q8 e/ M1 b! y, g
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Shave armpits and legs.' U; M; n! j) ?/ ~* \6 t( Y
E3 t5 f% ^/ }Turn off shower." y4 `. O5 G& q1 R( F
1 j- T1 w& x. b" i: S' O1 w8 xSqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower., Z3 X5 F4 H9 m; f) {
a' q( Z# p( PSpray mold spots with Tilex. - X6 p" w3 U1 q( T
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Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. " a6 f% R9 S) ~0 N3 R5 s! m$ Y+ y
8 J* T' H0 `! ^2 m5 p8 \Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
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+ ]' q# K+ n- z" d# n# kIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. 4 H, R, {7 i7 ^% y1 u6 z4 w" F
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
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! C$ n4 m5 B# e7 T' _" ?& mTake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. 2 @& p8 Q1 x: ^; k! T
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Walk naked to the bathroom.' D. C$ Y H2 J5 a: {
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
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Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
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Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
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Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. * _" P o' v) S2 [2 @
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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# |" `$ `% S0 ^9 M% v2 I. [& }Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
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; C% a7 f4 i% g& B) `* K: HWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. ; ?4 }% o( }7 [
. Y% s( X. Q+ t# x$ y7 z3 p' W6 zWash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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Pee.
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Rinse off and get out of shower.
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) \1 v$ o; O* DPartially dry off.
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! M& w3 X9 {/ g" q4 j- cFail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. 5 x* V/ j# _" d( L1 x
- \0 B+ V& ]* P* p z e- c3 nAdmire wiener size in mirror again. 2 r/ H* h4 O' q6 A6 ~" G
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Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. % K8 D6 Y/ r4 {2 e; }% ~" j
* I$ G: B5 G2 m* X% T6 vReturn to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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Throw wet towel on bed.
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If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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