English language

billzhao

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?

Let's face it
3 o5 _$ b5 n: |9 J5 c2 u# k7 R4 O, `  XEnglish is a stupid language.
- o- R' {7 F3 GThere is no egg in the eggplant
# K5 ?+ o( F5 ?, _" FNo ham in the hamburger
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
3 M8 N7 P/ I6 k3 A. {& rEnglish muffins were not invented in England
French fries were not invented in France.

% p7 P6 J8 ]; n' c% jWe sometimes take English for granted
6 X# S0 C. N" @( X7 _3 V1 XBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
Quicksand takes you down slowly
Boxing rings are square
7 g% H( t9 n' U: fAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

. G. v, q7 I/ K/ yIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
8 n: e% R/ I3 D: W& T4 aIf the plural of tooth is teeth
) M' V  g/ _6 b6 V2 @7 q" vShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
If the teacher taught,
Why didn't the preacher praught.

If a vegetarian eats vegetables
8 @9 ]  @% A! F/ H; uWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
1 d9 J$ l! l1 B( G; n* BWhy do people recite at a play
( {* K0 X: v; {  JYet play at a recital?
Park on driveways and
/ w) c' `) J. x+ c. [Drive on parkways
: h* z& c0 J2 n" n8 u
  [8 o$ X' \! b7 Q9 _& F" JYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy
1 c' F1 l3 w$ d8 g$ }Of a language where a house can burn up as
It burns down
And in which you fill in a form
By filling it out
+ {: ~" h) R2 e$ P6 z/ g% TAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!
1 G7 S  t+ [% ~) u; }
English was invented by people, not computers
5 Z$ X$ g( }$ M  |# n8 hAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race
5 b& }* J- E( `1 C% V(Which of course isn't a race at all)
) g+ d9 M; g- |2 W: B3 S
That is why
When the stars are out they are visible
5 M9 U& \3 _; B4 D: k3 tBut when the lights are out they are invisible
' y6 d8 a# w; R+ HAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch
It starts
; r+ W' x  {. G. d+ K3 L0 |But when I wind up this observation,
' p7 F; O9 v% H8 |% WIt ends.

YZSUNNY

suvescape

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
% s" Y. R8 y0 K; n4 D0 E3 x1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
% h0 r; m  I: G3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.
4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.

suvescape

应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.

没心没肺

billzhao

原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
我看了几行,就看不下去了.
% d$ q- ?. m5 V1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
% j& ]9 M  x& i/ m2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

$ `; `& {( b' X
谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢？
实话讲，这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误

lington

能写出此文的人，一定是深得英文精髓。幽默，有趣。

小柔

我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗？如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。

abcd460

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沃索拉呐

说得不错，有收获，顶一下

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