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% A9 y. `6 |" U0 qWhy did God make mothers?" {! t* S4 s( I C
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1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is., N. h* q) ~0 e( Q& l
2. Mostly to clean the house. 8 g+ v" r- L, K
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born. ! Y5 p( V+ a" ~, i5 t% e" D% ~) K
" M) L4 c! ?3 V, X1 tHow did God make mothers?
0 K! [& V" R1 @) {/ F/ n% V1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
- f) L2 ?) I7 t5 a2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring. 0 `9 ]/ \' H0 |& @9 ~
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts. - J, V$ @+ `5 z% t' p* m& P- R- f
: L, a0 X+ I. `1 jWhat ingredients are mothers made of ? . e0 O8 [. k' H M. {2 _2 S- Y; D- X
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
% N5 I$ a: a+ A% N6 ^, R( Y2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think. `1 h" z. A4 O0 {
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Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom? ! ]2 j% D+ a5 Z, ^
1. We're related.
3 c& k) _0 j6 ]) g( u; V s2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.
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What kind of little girl was your mom?
$ w0 g0 O$ z+ T4 f! O3 ]1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
2 Z. R3 C' _. w% t- b! J" V2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
% E. x' q" g- F: H7 S- W' R1 Y3. They say she used to be nice. 9 ]1 [( ]$ e; u1 H9 T3 |/ n
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What did mom need to know about dad before she married him? & L! M$ m* N c: }2 t7 W
1. His last name.5 p# ~: H7 ]5 ]0 d
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
; R8 z' l& x6 W0 s9 Q3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores? & n$ i+ c; Y2 W" X! E) _# M2 ]8 y: ?
1 L* o+ I- U/ A: L# `2 dWhy did your mom marry your dad? - x$ }" w9 q+ `. N% @5 {4 [
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot. , y& {/ O( X, q9 R, x3 w4 }- T
2. She got too old to do anything else with him. 2 j+ G) t8 z3 [$ k+ v- V% D
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.
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Who's the boss at your house? $ H- n. W8 D& Y
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
% b* J+ ?* D, T2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
5 P+ I4 E: D& Y+ F3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad. 9 R7 e8 U' G6 r4 X6 d+ N
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What's the difference between moms & dads? ( W% q L* L" B
1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
- |! b2 q7 t- p T: o2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.1 }/ s# u* `1 M7 I7 X
3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's. 3 b9 W W& N' l. r
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine. 9 ] R8 {2 V9 f- `
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What does your mom do in her spare time?
. y% A* U% |3 N9 }9 z# X1. Mothers don't do spare time.
9 a# s! v" E! N7 V2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.
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4 L& q8 R# B1 ^( d: d" tWhat would it take to make your mom perfect? # ?1 r4 r1 n6 e0 X! ?* i
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
6 n* M5 }. [' Z' P8 I2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.
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If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be? + U1 c7 p& Y- ] P/ U
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that. ( V, K5 `4 ~- P) G; c" h7 D
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
6 d, [; j0 |* h3 j3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head. & k: w4 c& C. m8 Y1 T
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